Learning to Walk, Learning to Talk, Learning to Say My Name

Uy skweyul, friends 🧡

A few weeks ago, George was sitting in a meeting about a land acknowledgement when a staff member asked him a simple question: did he prefer to be called by his Traditional name, or his English one?

He told us how much that question meant to him. Not because it was polite, but because of what it showed: someone paying attention, someone willing to ask instead of assume.

That question opens up into something bigger for this week's Teachings Tuesday. George shares two stories — one about a friend named Loren nervously practicing his name before introducing him on stage, and one about his mom, a lesson about learning to walk and learning to talk. Together they get at something so many of us carry: the fear of getting someone's name wrong, and what it actually means to try.

Over to you, Wholwolet'za.

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Listen To This Teaching:

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Uy skweyul (Good day), Siiye’yu (Friends),

Something has been sitting with me lately, and I want to share it with you for this week's Teaching Tuesday.

So many people are afraid to use our Traditional names, out of fear of getting them wrong. I understand that fear. It comes from a place of respect. But I want to offer a different way of looking at it.

For me, the usage of my Traditional name has been a big journey. In my younger years, it did not feel safe to bring it out in public. The only time my Traditional name was used was in our Traditional home, or within our communities. Today, my Traditional name is on my personal and professional signatures. It is on my social media presence. It is part of how I introduce myself to the world. That is not a small thing. That is a journey of reclaiming space, and reclaiming voice.

Recently, Kim and I were in a meeting with an organization. They wanted help doing a proper land acknowledgement for their company. During the meeting, one of the staff asked me if I preferred to be addressed by my Traditional name or my English name. I was so grateful for that question. It showed a great deal of care from this person and their organization. It showed me that they were not just checking a box. They were paying attention.

I once spoke at a grand opening ceremony for Encompass Support Services Society. My friend Loren was going to introduce me to the crowd. Before the introduction, he came up to me and asked how to say my name correctly. I said it out loud for him. We practiced it together, a few times. He shared with me that he was nervous to get it wrong. That moment of asking, of practicing, of caring enough to try, meant a great deal to me.

Huy ch q'u to my friend Loren, for trying your very best to pronounce my Traditional name. It meant a lot to me, the effort you put into speaking my name.

In a meeting with the College of Pharmacists of BC, one of their staff, Sara, mentioned that a story I shared during a recent film project for the College had stuck with her. It is a story about learning to walk and learning to talk. Many people in our Core Community are familiar with this story, but for those who have not heard it, I will share it here.

When I was in college, in my very first semester, I was struggling. I was not doing as well as I had hoped in my classes. I called my mom crying, telling her that I was failing, and that I just wanted to come home. She let me have my little pity party. When the silence hit the phone call, she asked me, "Are you done now?"

Then my mom shared a teaching with me that has stayed with me ever since. She said, "When you came into this world, you did not know how to walk, and you did not know how to talk. You had to learn how to do those things. When you were learning how to walk, I watched you fall. When you were learning how to talk, I heard you mispronounce words. But over time you learned from your mistakes, and now look at you. You are walking, and you are talking."

My mom gave me permission to be imperfect. She reminded me that I am a human being, and that human beings need to learn how to do things. We learn by falling. We learn by mispronouncing. We learn by trying again.

In that meeting with the College, my friend Sara asked for permission to try to pronounce my Traditional name, Wholwolet'za. Without hesitation, I told her to try, and I told her not to be afraid if she got it wrong. I said to her that I will always be there to give corrections with care.

Huy ch q'u Sara, for stepping out of your comfort zone to try and say my name. It meant so much to me, the care you showed and the strength it took to step forward and try.

That is the phrase I want to leave with you: corrections with care. When someone tries and stumbles, we do not shame them. We gently guide them, the same way my mom guided me, the same way our Elders guide all of us. Do not be embarrassed if you get it wrong. The only time you should be embarrassed is if you give up and never try again.

Our names carry our families, our territories, and our histories. When you make the effort to say them, even imperfectly, you are honouring all of that. You are telling us that we belong in every room we walk into, fully, as ourselves.

So the next time you are unsure how to say someone's Traditional name, ask. Practice it. Try it out loud, even if your tongue trips over it the first few times. We will not laugh at you. We will walk alongside you, the same way Loren and Sara let me walk alongside them. That is how we build a world where our names are spoken with pride, not avoided out of fear.

Huy ch q'u | Thank you 

Wholwolet'za | George Harris Jr

Corrections with care. That's the phrase George leaves us with, and it's one worth sitting with.

So many of us hold back from using someone's Traditional name because we're afraid of getting it wrong. George is telling us the opposite is true: the trying is the honouring. The stumbling is allowed. What matters is that we keep reaching.

Next time you're unsure how to say a name, ask. Practice it out loud. Let your tongue trip over it a few times. That's not disrespect, that's the work.

Huy ch q'u, George, for trusting us with this teaching.

🧡 Kim + the CC Team